Coupleting

High points of my romantic history in verse

image by David Tadevosian on shutterstock.com

Told Kim I’d been with girls in bed,
She quickly learned she’d been misled

Vanessa had a jail tattoo,
Cheated on me, but I knew

Karen dug the punk rock bands,
Dated me and all my friends

Siobhan and I were mostly bored,
Fucked so we could say we scored

Julia was my friend’s girlfriend,
I should have guessed how that would end

Susan lived in NYC,
Smart, cool, and way too hip for me

Tracey said she could do better,
She was right, I torched her letters

I thought that Keiko was the one,
She wasn’t, but we sure had fun

Next was Sarah, we broke up twice,
Her kids are grown now, they seem nice

Katherine was prone to scary rage,
Told all her friends we were engaged

Ann’s in China, I’m not sure where,
We chat on Facebook once a year